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"Don't Try to Mc-Law Me!" My Recent Experience With San Mateo County Public Pretender


Believers of justice here me now!!!!!

So let me start by sharing a little bit about me, which is both highly personal, and some real ass shit when it comes to me. For those of you whom may or may not know me all that well, there is, has been, and always will be embedded with-in me; or there always has been a fundamental part of my psychological, spiritual, and help even physical make-up or compound that makes me who I am that believes absolutely in absolute justice! Now, before you start laughing or saying things like “Me too” or “Who doesn’t believe in justice?” Take your naivety cap off, and put down the gun glasses that turn everything rose or rainbow colored when you look through them. See, there’s an undisputed truth about this world and how it works, and that undisputed truth is that justice is actually extraordinarily hard to find in this world for exactly the reason that most of the people in this world not only don’t believe in justice, but actually try very hard to avoid it, destroy it, and actively hate the notion of true justice. If I were in correct in my assertions, than true justice would not be so damned hard to find or seem so rare when we are lucky enough to witness it, let alone be an agent of reciprocation or creator of true justice in this world!

It is my sense of justice, and need for it that drove me to study the law, and eventually graduate from law school. Moreover, for those of you whom don’t yet know as much, but yet often bear witness to my many heated writings, postings, rantings, and elongated literary railings about all manner of perceived injustices, the erosion of our civil rights, current and past inequities at law, and of course the many current and gross violations of Constitutional cannon so long observed that the common law is older than over two-hundred and fifty years old. Despite my belief in the often radical departure the law has currently taken from the traditionally established doctrines of juris prudence; at my core and base it is always my incessant need for justice that inspires my pen and spurs on my rhetorical venom!

At the same time, even for all my bickering about the current way in which the American Common Law, Statutes, and Constitution are currently and routinely mistreated, disregarded, and distorted, I still have an absolute and fundamental belief in practice and observance of American law. For it is my belief in the law, and its ability to bring men and society as close to reliable and calculable levels of true justice as we ever may get. At least as long as we remain the loathsome and self-serving creatures that every single one of us is in reality secretly, and yet hopefully ashamedly and with a hint of honest humility about the emotional and physical frailties we suffer as human-beings that does pits our very instincts towards selfishness against our inner quest to become that nobler more evolved creature that all of us strive to be in one way or another.

Now knowing these things about myself, and that I hold these believes and truths to be self-evident; I tell all reading this now that today I witnessed and experienced a gross lack of justice in a place and from an group of individuals whom society and myself does hold to be of a higher standard of the pursuit of justice, but whom did so disappoint me due to the levels of depravity of justice and honor, and so infuriated me with their contempt for the law and the practice thereof; that I must now announce to those whom may happen upon these words that “They have a real problem, as I once again am desirous of practicing aw, and desirous of such so as to fight for those whom can’t fight for themselves, to punish and hold to account those whom would dare to treat the pursuit of true justice through the practice of appropriately, ethically, and lawfully practice of juris prudence as little more than dodge, hustle, or just another job where they attempt to “McLaw” the public! (MC-Law is a term used by real attorney's to describe quick, cheap, and usually harmful to clients legal actions at law. Get it. Like fast food!)

Alright… So enough beating around the bush and stalling! Let me be clear about exactly happened to me today, which has got me so enraged and re-inspired to finally complete my forever quest, pass the CA State Bar Exam, and finally become a fully licensed attorney at law! Believe it or not today I met, and am actually currently being represented by a “Public Pretender!” At least for now, as I may end up shit canning his ass, asking the Court for substitution of Counsel, and then report his ass to the State Bar for ineffective assistance of counsel and possibly mal-practice! I’ll fucking do it to, because there is nothing more disgraceful, pathetic, DANGEROUS, retards fairness, or aborts justice from legal proceedings more thoroughly than a fucking Public Pretender! I mean I always thought stories about attorney’s like this were the over exaggerated confusion of clients or defendants that merely don’t understand thoroughly the process of legal proceedings! I never imagined for a second that these judgmental and resentful attorneys, whom formulate ideas and opinions as to the guilt of their clients via snap decisions, based on little more than a quick glance at their clients, and the obviously less than flattering description of their clients contained in the Prosecutors complaint! However, now that I know and understand that these attorneys are actually out there, and often on the pay-roll of the government no less… I vow to do all in my human capacity to see to it that (A) Attorney’s like these are stopped and forbade forever from pretending to offer effective assistance of counsel to those members of the public, at exactly the time in their lives that they more than ever need by their side a truthful and none reserved advocate and advisor!

Had I not possessed my extensive legal training, and been the common moronic criminal that my attorney was just too busy to defend or even hear out today… I would literally be sitting in the county jail right now and wrongfully so!!! Why? Well, I am glad you asked. So let me paint a picture for you. I had court today at 1:30pm, and my attorney shows up at approximately 4pm! His excuse? He was in court all afternoon. That’s fine. I understand Court, and glad to hear he’s apparently working hard for someone, even if that person is not me. However!!! You don’t then leave your client to sit there for hours wondering what the hell they should do! You get word to your client, which apprises them of the situation! Have a fellow attorney put the matter over. I mean you do freaking something!!! A less educated client may have ended up leaving the Court House out of confusion and frustration, which would have resulted in a bench warrant being issued! It’s almost as if this guy was hoping I’d leave.

So any way, he breezes in with about 15 minutes left on the Courts clock. I mean I believe the only reason this guy bothered to even show up is I kept asking the Sheriff’s if they knew my attorney and if they had seen him? The Sheriff Bailiff’s were actually feeling sorry for me towards the end, cause I mean this was beyond rude. It was outright insulting! Then when he does show up, he begins to act like HE is the law! He starts telling me how I am going to take this deal he just worked out with the D.A., and I’m to do ten days, pay $2,000, and there’d be no change in the status of my driver’s license. Just classic “Doctor treating symptoms, and ignoring the disease shit,” of course that’s only if a ten day stay in jail, two year’s probation, a $2,000 fine, and no change in the status of my driver’s license; which is the whole problem any way, as I’m facing two driving on a suspended license charges!

I get it. He was tired. He had had a long day. It’s hot. He wants to go home. He wanted to get out of there and therefore my life and my issues he has no time for. No, I can just do ten days and all that other shit, because fuck Joel… That’s why! Well, while being as polite as possible, I explained to the not so nice man that “Yeah… I’m not doing that!” I then proceeded to hand him the Response to Allegations I drafted earlier that day, you know the one HE should had written, but didn’t… Because again… You know… Fuck Joel! That’s about the time the lights went on in this half-wits head, and he realized he had an educated law school graduate from Hillsborough in front of him, whom had not been arrested, let alone even talk to a cop as a criminal or suspect in over fifteen years! The old shovel the white-trash under the rug routine he most likely pulls on all his other clients, just wasn’t going to fucking fly with me.

I am not impressed that he is an attorney, because I am an attorney, and I do not believe him to be of any greater intelligence than myself. In fact, he is probably dumber. However, my point is the “Listen to me because I am in charge, because I am your attorney” routine isn’t going to work with me, as it does with his other clients. There are several reasons why, but probably the most important reason is that I too am an educated white male, and regardless of what he may believe “HE WORKS FOR ME!” Not the other way around, and I wasn’t tolerating being bullied by the person paid to protect me! However, I could only imagine how many clients have been bullied and railroaded by this jerk! I mean if I was not legally trained, he may have been able to do the shit to me as well. That’s what scares me, and is what is pissing me off!

Finally, he got that we are not doing what HE wants to do, and instead are doing what I want to do. My arguments, my strategy, or he can get fired. I know the process, and I am half tempted to represent myself at this point! However, this would be a dumb move, because there are good attorney’s out there that don’t act like this. However, experiencing this it is clear to me that San Mateo County needs a dedicated and full-time Public Defenders Office, like San Francisco, Alameda, Contra Costa, and Santa Clara all have. An Office with dedicated, well paid staff, and that can help weigh in on policy issues regarding the intelligence (Or lack thereof.) of the various criminal laws passed at the County level. As for me we are to have a meeting today, whereby I am to show him my case law. The reason being we disagree as to the interpretation of the statutes.

What’s really funny is sense I am becoming more involved with this issue, now I am going to demand the Constitutional arguments be made in regards to double jeopardy, and the state punishing all DUI offenders “TWICE” for the exact same crimes! This could get interesting, as at most I face less than a month jail time, should I go to the mat, and fight the thing in trial! This could be, and actually now is my opportunity to raise the Constitutional arguments, and blow the DMV’s power, administrative hearings, and double suspensions out of the water!!!! It’s funny… Here these cops thought that by fucking with me, they’d be harming me! In reality, it is they whom could or can now lose certain powers, because these fuckers were dumb enough to drag me into Court. Well… If we’re going to dance baby…. THEN LET’S FUCKING DANCE! Word!


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